Top 10 Signs You’ll Never Play for Major League Baseball


Not everyone can play in the big leagues: it takes talent, dedication and a little bit of luck. You might have big aspirations, but that doesn’t mean that a MLB team will be where you find your career. What are the top 10 signs you’ll never play for major league baseball? Read ’em here.


Don’t know much about baseball, do you? It’s every fourteen-year-old boy’s dream: to be a Bat Boy for his favorite team. But Bat Boys don’t help save the world; they just pick up the baseball bats that players drop.


So you turned down the offer to play for a farm team. Since this is where MLB coaches groom young, talented prospects, you probably lost your shot at the big leagues. There’s no tractors, and not a single horse in sight. Just the chance to play ball for a tiny little salary.


When Coach said he wanted some Grand Slams, he wasn’t talking about bacon, eggs and pancakes. Though in your case, Denny’s might be your only shot at getting one.


The hat is required. You’re not going to catch that fly ball if the sun is glaring in your face. Get over yourself, pretty boy.


But when you got caught, you ended up serving time. Turns out that Big 5 Sporting Goods prosecutes shoplifters.


If the last time you wore your catcher’s mask was for a “Jason” costume on Halloween in 1987, you probably won’t be working as a catcher for MLB.


Coach wants you to practice bunting, but you’re wondering where one gets patriotic swags this late in the year.


If you’re the kind of kid that always has droopy socks and an untucked shirt, baseball is not your game.


Fans yell mean things at the away team’s batters. The batters aren’t supposed to start crying at home plate.


As “cleanup,” you’re supposedly one of the best hitters on the team. But obviously not the smartest.