Top 10 Signs You’ll Never Play for Major League Baseball

You'llNeverPlayForMLB

Not everyone can play in the big leagues: it takes talent, dedication and a little bit of luck. You might have big aspirations, but that doesn’t mean that a MLB team will be where you find your career. What are the top 10 signs you’ll never play for major league baseball? Read ’em here.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB1

Don’t know much about baseball, do you? It’s every fourteen-year-old boy’s dream: to be a Bat Boy for his favorite team. But Bat Boys don’t help save the world; they just pick up the baseball bats that players drop.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB2

So you turned down the offer to play for a farm team. Since this is where MLB coaches groom young, talented prospects, you probably lost your shot at the big leagues. There’s no tractors, and not a single horse in sight. Just the chance to play ball for a tiny little salary.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB3

When Coach said he wanted some Grand Slams, he wasn’t talking about bacon, eggs and pancakes. Though in your case, Denny’s might be your only shot at getting one.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB4

The hat is required. You’re not going to catch that fly ball if the sun is glaring in your face. Get over yourself, pretty boy.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB5

But when you got caught, you ended up serving time. Turns out that Big 5 Sporting Goods prosecutes shoplifters.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB6

If the last time you wore your catcher’s mask was for a “Jason” costume on Halloween in 1987, you probably won’t be working as a catcher for MLB.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB7

Coach wants you to practice bunting, but you’re wondering where one gets patriotic swags this late in the year.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB8

If you’re the kind of kid that always has droopy socks and an untucked shirt, baseball is not your game.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB9

Fans yell mean things at the away team’s batters. The batters aren’t supposed to start crying at home plate.

You'llNeverPlayForMLB10

As “cleanup,” you’re supposedly one of the best hitters on the team. But obviously not the smartest.

Nelson James

Nelson James is the chief operating officer of Signs.com and is responsible for the day-to-day operations of the company. Prior to joining the Signs.com team, Nelson was the president and co-founder of SEO.com. For over 6 years he helped to grow the company from 2 to over 85 employees. Nelson managed many large accounts during his tenure at SEO.com, including Dell.com. In early 2011, Nelson was recruited to Lendio Inc., where he was VP of marketing and was responsible for the creation and management of a marketing team as well as the strategy, tactics and programs to create interest and demand for Lendio’s products and services. Prior to his work experience, Nelson graduated Cum Laude from Brigham Young University in marketing and advertising from the communications department. Nelson lives in Lehi, Utah with his wife and three children. He currently holds leadership positions in scouting and volunteers in his church and community.