The movie Oz the Great and Powerful opens in theaters across the country today. We hope there’s no confusion, but in case there is, here are the Top 10 Signs You Aren’t in Kansas Anymore.
Even in 1939, Frank Baum knew the importance of a stylish pair of shoes. If you look down at your feet and they’re adorned with sparkly, ruby red flats… you’re not in Kansas anymore.
No, monkeys don’t fly. And they aren’t native to Kansas, either.
Do you dream in color? If you’re no longer in Kansas you do.
Kansas has a pretty low homicide to begin with. But no one in Kansas’ history has ever killed someone by dropping a house on her.
No matter how many flying monkey chase you, no matter how many mean witches grab you up, your hair stays perfect and you pinafore is spotless. You can’t even prune the roses in Kansas without getting dirty and disheveled.
Kansans once relied on the likes of Wyatt Earp, Wild Bill Hickok and Bat Masterson to save them from the bad guys. They never cried. Ever.
In Kansas, the best you can hope for is a flash mob at the local mall.
If you throw water on the local witch in Kansas, she’ll just have you arrested for assault.
If you were still in Kansas, surely he’d reside in a Coach bag. A picnic basket seems both uncomfortable for poor Toto and rather unsanitary.
Wait… that probably applies to politicians in Kansas (and everywhere else). Well, nine out of ten ain’t bad.